I'm feeling restless for some reason.
I've been on an antibiotic now for about three weeks, and I have three more weeks to go for a total of six weeks. The doctors say that I have chronic sinusitis along with a resurregence of allergies. This is hard with the Type 1 Diabetes, because getting sick is cyclical - get sick, feel bad, blood sugars go up, feel worse, get sicker, etc.
I still have to work my full time teaching job in order to live and support myself, and that wears me out too. I also tutor after school and teach Summer School.
I'm not saying this for you to feel sorry for me - by no means.
I just have a hard time understanding CAPABLE people who CAN work, but choose not to and have EVERY excuse in the book why they can't and then live off the government, the middle class paycheck, and/or others who do work.
Sadly, I see a lot of these people.
I don't mean those who need a temporary hand to get back up on their feet. We all understand that. I mean those who live in an entitled way and feel that they deserve to be cared for just because they were born.
I don't get any assistance for having Type 1 Diabetes, and I feel pretty lethargic and sometimes downright lousy on many (if not most) days, but I still get up, put on a happy face, love on my students, put my all and energy into teaching, tutor after school, and teach in the summer too.
I just see so many capable young people and adults who just want to sit around, eat, and socialize all day, and that is their main ambition because they know they'll be provided for and live off some other entity. That would be fine if they were picking up the tab, but most of these are not.
I can't solve the totality of this problem, and I guess I just felt the need to speak on this topic tonight, but some days I just feel the weight of living and working and wonder why it feels like trudging through mud to get through a day and then I see some of these others living relatively carefree on others' blood, sweat, and tears.
************************************
If you knew me in the flow of my life, you would know that I'm not judgmental and very understanding and that I totally love and would give and do anything for my students, but sometimes I get down when I see why they don't have more ambition to do better.
I guess I end up venting and sharing my disappointment here in this blog sometimes.
I digress, though, because I actually was writing about something else.
************************************
After I have taken the several weeks of antibiotics, this is the first time in a long while that my body feels pretty good - not lethargic, not exhausted. This has been over the last couple of days.
I am highly appreciative and thankful of this.
At the same time, though, I am incredibly "restless" about something that I can't put my finger on.
I feel restless - not settled, and I don't understand what it pertains to. This is odd for me.
This is just me writing this down, so that I can try to understand this "restlessness."
I'll keep praying about it too.
I've been on an antibiotic now for about three weeks, and I have three more weeks to go for a total of six weeks. The doctors say that I have chronic sinusitis along with a resurregence of allergies. This is hard with the Type 1 Diabetes, because getting sick is cyclical - get sick, feel bad, blood sugars go up, feel worse, get sicker, etc.
I still have to work my full time teaching job in order to live and support myself, and that wears me out too. I also tutor after school and teach Summer School.
I'm not saying this for you to feel sorry for me - by no means.
I just have a hard time understanding CAPABLE people who CAN work, but choose not to and have EVERY excuse in the book why they can't and then live off the government, the middle class paycheck, and/or others who do work.
Sadly, I see a lot of these people.
I don't mean those who need a temporary hand to get back up on their feet. We all understand that. I mean those who live in an entitled way and feel that they deserve to be cared for just because they were born.
I don't get any assistance for having Type 1 Diabetes, and I feel pretty lethargic and sometimes downright lousy on many (if not most) days, but I still get up, put on a happy face, love on my students, put my all and energy into teaching, tutor after school, and teach in the summer too.
I just see so many capable young people and adults who just want to sit around, eat, and socialize all day, and that is their main ambition because they know they'll be provided for and live off some other entity. That would be fine if they were picking up the tab, but most of these are not.
I can't solve the totality of this problem, and I guess I just felt the need to speak on this topic tonight, but some days I just feel the weight of living and working and wonder why it feels like trudging through mud to get through a day and then I see some of these others living relatively carefree on others' blood, sweat, and tears.
************************************
If you knew me in the flow of my life, you would know that I'm not judgmental and very understanding and that I totally love and would give and do anything for my students, but sometimes I get down when I see why they don't have more ambition to do better.
I guess I end up venting and sharing my disappointment here in this blog sometimes.
I digress, though, because I actually was writing about something else.
************************************
After I have taken the several weeks of antibiotics, this is the first time in a long while that my body feels pretty good - not lethargic, not exhausted. This has been over the last couple of days.
I am highly appreciative and thankful of this.
At the same time, though, I am incredibly "restless" about something that I can't put my finger on.
I feel restless - not settled, and I don't understand what it pertains to. This is odd for me.
This is just me writing this down, so that I can try to understand this "restlessness."
I'll keep praying about it too.
3 comments:
I'm glad you're feeling better. Perhaps the warmer weather and being able to walk along the beach more often has revitalized your spirit, which in turn has revitalized your body and given you more energy.
I can relate to the "restlessness" that you feel because I've felt a restlessness of my own for quite some time.
It's puzzling when we can't identify the source of the restlessness. Praying about it is definitely a good idea.
I know what you mean. I don't understand people not wanting to work at all. Restlessness can happen...especially if you've been sick. It's good that you're looking at it and reflecting/trying to figure it out. Hope you feel better soon! xo
Maybe the restlessness is just good ol' Spring Fever! I know *I* get it!
I despise people who "use the system" and don't work because they don't WANT to. I am hearing impaired, and have worked since I was 14. So I understand how you feel. Vent anytime, it's YOUR blog!
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