PROUD OF MYSELF

Now, this is probably not anything earth-shattering for most of you, but I actually did my own taxes tonight for the first time in over twelve years. Twelve years because for the last eleven years up until last year, I've been married and my husband wanted his accountant to handle the taxes.

Now that I'm single and doing everything on my own, back in February when I first received my W-2 forms, I went to H&R Block to have them do my taxes with the idea in mind that I was getting a Refund.

WRONG. :(

They said I owed. Hmph. Very unexpected and depressing news. : )

To rectify the high amount owed due to an underpayment of my taxes because my marital status (married to single) changed last year, the H&R Block person was so nice and recommended I just file electronically closer to April 15th (tomorrow - I'm close!) when I could set some money aside to pay toward the total amount.

I didn't file electronically, but I have filled out all the paperwork and what makes me so happy is that my numbers DOING IT ALL BY MYSELF ON PAPER came out to exactly what the H&R Block computer and accountant came up with for me back in February.

This is a big deal for me because I definitely have an English Teacher's mind. I don't lean well toward tax accounting or number crunching in general. If it isn't basic math calculations (and maybe some basic Algebra and Geometry - my favorite), it usually reads like Greek to me. I was always horrible with word problems, and tax forms are like hellish word problems to me. They just seem so confusing, and the more I would try to understand in the past, the more confused I would get.

Not so this time! It all worked out, even with the "go here" and "fill out this extra form" or "do this calculation." My numbers were right!!!

Of course, as happy as I am about the numbers matching exactly, I am also reminded that those numbers mean a deficit in my pocket and paycheck.

The numbers do match, but mean I owe.

Urgh.

Oh well. I'm happy that I was able to do it myself.

I even took a picture of myself with the finished results to post here. If you don't see it right now, I'll post it tomorrow. It's just a silly little picture of me with a big smile and my paperwork, but no details from the returns visible.

I might not be good with numbers, but I have some idea THAT would add up to no good on someone's part.

Happy Tax Day, Friends!

RESTLESS

I'm feeling restless for some reason.

I've been on an antibiotic now for about three weeks, and I have three more weeks to go for a total of six weeks. The doctors say that I have chronic sinusitis along with a resurregence of allergies. This is hard with the Type 1 Diabetes, because getting sick is cyclical - get sick, feel bad, blood sugars go up, feel worse, get sicker, etc.

I still have to work my full time teaching job in order to live and support myself, and that wears me out too. I also tutor after school and teach Summer School.

I'm not saying this for you to feel sorry for me - by no means.

I just have a hard time understanding CAPABLE people who CAN work, but choose not to and have EVERY excuse in the book why they can't and then live off the government, the middle class paycheck, and/or others who do work.

Sadly, I see a lot of these people.

I don't mean those who need a temporary hand to get back up on their feet. We all understand that. I mean those who live in an entitled way and feel that they deserve to be cared for just because they were born.

I don't get any assistance for having Type 1 Diabetes, and I feel pretty lethargic and sometimes downright lousy on many (if not most) days, but I still get up, put on a happy face, love on my students, put my all and energy into teaching, tutor after school, and teach in the summer too.

I just see so many capable young people and adults who just want to sit around, eat, and socialize all day, and that is their main ambition because they know they'll be provided for and live off some other entity. That would be fine if they were picking up the tab, but most of these are not.

I can't solve the totality of this problem, and I guess I just felt the need to speak on this topic tonight, but some days I just feel the weight of living and working and wonder why it feels like trudging through mud to get through a day and then I see some of these others living relatively carefree on others' blood, sweat, and tears.

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If you knew me in the flow of my life, you would know that I'm not judgmental and very understanding and that I totally love and would give and do anything for my students, but sometimes I get down when I see why they don't have more ambition to do better.

I guess I end up venting and sharing my disappointment here in this blog sometimes.

I digress, though, because I actually was writing about something else.

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After I have taken the several weeks of antibiotics, this is the first time in a long while that my body feels pretty good - not lethargic, not exhausted. This has been over the last couple of days.

I am highly appreciative and thankful of this.

At the same time, though, I am incredibly "restless" about something that I can't put my finger on.

I feel restless - not settled, and I don't understand what it pertains to. This is odd for me.

This is just me writing this down, so that I can try to understand this "restlessness."

I'll keep praying about it too.

Change My Photo?

Should I change my Profile Picture?

I've had the other one up since I joined Blogger last September.

I took this picture today after work. It has my new glasses.

Tell me what you think and if you have a preference.

By the way, I was on the beach all day yesterday, and I actually have a horrible, horrible sun burn on my back and arms. I even used sunscreen, but I was out so long on an overcast day that the sun got the better of me.

My face is mildly sunburned here. Is it noticeable?

Thanks for your thoughts.

PIGS ARE FLYING!

The expression "When pigs fly. . ." denotes something coming true that seemed impossible.

I am here to tell you that pigs must be flying, and, no, it's not because I recently did some baking (which I'm actually good at).

Why are pigs flying?

I have discovered a low-fat, high-fiber brownie recipe that also naturally includes protein! YES!

Do you see my lovely pictures above? Those are pictures of my SECOND batch of Black Bean Brownies! They were so good the first time that I made a second batch today!

Don't let the name throw you off. If you didn't know they had Black Beans in them, you wouldn't know they had Black Beans in them. : ) You would NEVER guess. I dare you to try the recipe and see for yourself. The texture is a little more moist than the standard brownie recipe, but who wouldn't like moister brownies?

Some years ago I saw a show where a lady lost weight and she sited a chocolate cake recipe where she used beans. I have tried for a long time to find any such recipe, and I never could until I saw this brownie recipe on SparkPeople.com last month.

I love brownies, and this makes me feel less guilty about enjoying them, and they really do taste delicious.

Here is the recipe from www.sparkpeople.com :

BLACK BEAN BROWNIES

1 -15 oz can Black Beans (drained and rinsed well)
4 large eggs
1/2 cup granulated Splenda (I have used a 1/2 cup sugar instead.)
3 tbsp cocoa powder
2 tbsp strong coffee or espresso (or 1 tbsp instant coffee dissolved in 1 tbsp hot water)
1 tsp baking powder
2 tbsp canola or olive oil (I use vegetable oil.)
1 tsp vanilla

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Prepare an 8x8 baking pan by spraying it with cooking spray.
Mix all ingredients in a food processor or blender. (I use a Magic Bullet.)
Add the beans last and make sure you blend VERY well.

Bake for 30 minutes, or until toothpick comes out clean. (I have had to bake for 40 minutes in my oven.)

These brownies are delicious hot out of the oven or cooled down!

Try this recipe and tell me what you think!